The Other First Bond: Why Skin-to-Skin Isn’t Just for Moms

In the delivery room after a mother gives birth, it is common for the spotlight to fall squarely on the mother and her newborn miracle. And of course, mothers deserve every bit of attention as the baby they’ve been carrying for months finally makes its arrival. Indeed, pregnancy, labor, delivery, and postpartum recovery are nothing short of heroic. Still, in the midst of the crucial bonding that occurs between a mother and her child, a profound moment of human connection often gets overlooked, and that is the father’s first skin-to-skin (SSC) contact with his newborn. Without question, that crucial contact matters more than is typically discussed.

Research into the importance of skin-to-skin contact between a father and his newborn child demonstrates how beneficial it is for a baby to lie bare-chested against its father soon after birth. And it is even more beneficial when both parents are present in this bonding moment. Yet, in many hospitals, birthing classes, and family health discussions, the skin-to-skin connection between a father and his newborn is not treated as a critical parental intervention. In fact, it is often weeks, months, or even years before there is real talk about the importance of a father’s real-time, embodied engagement with his new infant. And that silence is telling.

In clinical studies, “kangaroo care” refers to placing a newborn, naked or diaper only, on a parent’s bare chest. The practice was initially described for its life-saving benefits in preterm babies, including helping regulate a baby’s temperature, stabilize breathing and blood oxygen levels, encourage breastfeeding, and even reduce crying. These physiological benefits are well documented and backed by decades of neonatal studies. And the science doesn’t stop at mere survival from SSC. In fact, studies show this contact fundamentally shapes the relationship between parent and child. But again, this contact is most often assumed to be between mother and child.

Why? The reasons are straightforward. Mothers naturally tend to be more protective of their newborns because of the physical connection they share throughout the nine months of pregnancy. Because of this, mothers are often the first ones to reach for their crying baby, and the mother-newborn relationship develops quickly when mothers breastfeed their infant. This closeness enables mothers to form an immediate, unique, and intimate bond with their newborn. Because of this, fathers often get a later start in building a relationship with their baby and take a different path towards building an attachment relationship, which might unintentionally overlook the power of SSC.

Indeed, a randomized controlled trial in Taiwan revealed that fathers who engaged in daily SSC with their newborn during the baby’s first three days of life outside the womb developed significantly stronger attachment, as measured by validated bonding scales (used in the study). Fathers who intentionally practiced skin-on-skin contact scored higher on not just cuddling and touching, but also on exploring, talking, and caring, which are behaviors deeply tied to long-term engagement with their baby. These are measurable emotional and behavioral changes that occur within just a few minutes of purposeful contact. The study illustrates a shift in the very psyche of parenting, because it turns out (and makes perfect sense) that oxytocin surges not just in mothers but also in fathers during SSC time, supporting emotional bonding and lowering parental stress.

Yet, one would think that we’d all be on the same page about this topic, but not so fast. While mother-and-baby skin-to-skin is praised as essential (and rightfully so), the same moment of contact between fathers and newborns is still treated like a sentimental bonus, if mentioned at all. The research is out there, but somehow it is not in the delivery room. In most hospital protocols (I highly encourage looking into home birth), dad steps in after the main performance is over. But connection doesn’t wait. Fathers who hold their babies skin-to-skin—even in the first 48 hours and even if in the NICU—often describe something unmistakable. They feel a shift, a grounding, that is like no other. They feel more sure of themselves, more bonded, and more present, which is what being a parent is supposed to be.

Again, even in the stress-intensive setting of a NICU, SSC with fathers has been proven to benefit both the infant and parent well-being, both physically and emotionally. In other words, fatherhood isn’t just something a dad “catches up to” after the newborn phase. It begins in the cradle of that quiet, chest-to-chest breath-to-breath intimacy where a human being learns—through touch—that they are seen and safe. So why isn’t there more discussion around this vital connection?

Historically, perinatal care has focused on women and babies, which makes sense given the biological realities of pregnancy. But that focus has also created a narrative gap around fathers. SSC with fathers is sometimes treated as a nice added bonus when time and schedules allow, rather than what it is, which is a core component of early attachment support. That certainly seems like a disservice to children, parents, and health systems alike. Yet, the reality is that fathers may not be offered the same encouragement as mothers to practice skin-to-skin contact. Not to mention, fathers are still routinely directed to the sidelines of newborn care, with limited or non-existent paternity leave.

If we could reframe early parenthood to include fathers in skin-to-skin care (with educational materials, encouragement from nurses and midwives, and policies that explicitly include dads), the whole family would exponentially benefit. Why? Because infants who receive SSC not only regulate more easily and are calmer and healthier in the short term and long term. Importantly, skin-to-skin contact with both mother and father immediately after birth shapes an infant’s brain and body, forming bonds that last a lifetime. Make no mistake, advocating for immediate father SSC isn’t about diminishing a mother’s role, but rather, it’s about expanding the narrative of critical nurturing. As God surely intended, the connection built through SSC between a father and his child ripples outward, enriching their relationship, easing maternal workload, and strengthening family soundness.

Thus, a father’s first skin-to-skin moment with his newborn should be a standard of care, a ritual of welcome, and a declaration that healthy fathers matter from the very first heartbeat outside of the womb.

Father's kiss for his newborn daughter prompted a reaction from the babypic.twitter.com/5q0g7pdGPv

— Wolf of X (@tradingMaxiSL) January 2, 2026